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| Palindromic Punctu-Smithian Allitero-betical Invocative Pentameter |
| [12239] by "ENORMOUS POET(max)" (208-58-250-124.s378.tnt1.nwhv.ct) on Wed 29 May 2002 15:55:47 [ reply ] |
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Palindromic Punctu-Smithian Allitero-betical Invocative Pentameter:
Finding Light at the end of the Modern Literary Tunnel By Maxfield and David Congratulations! You are about to explore the joys of Palindromic Punctu-Smithian Allitero-betical Invocative Pentameter. Read on, friend, and learn how to discover the structure of this thrilling new literary format, and, perhaps, rediscover yourself in the process. The first line of this 5-4-3-4-5 setup is doubtlessly the easiest. One must compose a line of five syllables which includes a comma and a question mark. Traditionally, it has been a quotation, although this has never been established per dictum. The second is slightly harder; Will Smith must be the underlying theme in this four syllable line. The poet must relate his/her personal aesthetic inspirations implicitly to those of Will Smith, be they his brilliant music compositions, his outstanding dramatic work and/or his exemplary religious devotion. Commonly, there is extensive use of ancient literary devices such as contractions, elisions, et al. as used in ancient literature such as Chaucer, Sweetkeyes and/or Shakespeare to satisfy the demanding four-syllable requirement. It goes without saying that these must be footnoted not only at the bottom of the page but also in the bibliography along with the appropriate context and relevant time period. The third line is three words long. If the poet is fortunate enough to arrive at the third line, he/she is in for a little treat. Our Aspiring Scribe is allowed, just this once, to stretch his/her limits and defy structure. As you have probably already guessed, he/she is finally permitted to choose between the alliteration of the three words or the organization of said words in direct alphabetical order. The fourth line utilizes invocation, adding the touchstone Palindromic Punctu-Smithian Allitero-betical Invocative Pentametric dramatic effect to the piece. The Greeks invoked the Muse for inspiration, Britney Spears invoked Baby, and now it is your turn to exercise this right for which the whole world will envy you. Thus, this four-syllable line must always begin with “O,” ironically making it essentially a three-syllable effort. Literary analysts have mulled over this bizarre “coincidence” for years, but have found nothing but further evidence toward Chavvy Sweetkeyes’ influence on the modernization of global society, which, though seemingly irrelevant, is certainly without a doubt at the crux of the matter. Ha, ha, sorry, that was just a little joke for you. The fifth and final piece of this wonderful cogitative puzzle is by far the most arduous task the daring Scribe will encounter on his/her nearly Herculean endeavor. A single word, endowed with no more or less than five syllables, must summarize the poem while simultaneously invigorating and inspiring the reader to reread the glorious finished product five additional times, perhaps inducing him/her to memorize and recite the work at the next opportunity, be it a family gathering, or a little get-together at the workplace. Failure to provoke this desired result is, of course, indicative of a failure in the intrinsic goal of Palindromic Punctu-Smithian Allitero-betical Invocative Pentameter. Above all, the scribe must remember to show, not tell, to accomplish this Oedipal feat. Use a green Crayola brand crayon and lined paper with 1 1/2 inch wide margins. Write your name and the date at the top left of the page (not the bottom left, contrary to popular belief). Note that the last line must be the title of the piece as well, so as to thematically accentuate the poet’s intentions, a sort of “rounding off” of the work. So now you near the end of the instructions and the beginning of your intellectual odyssey. We have left an example of a proper Palindromic Punctu-Smithian Allitero-betical Invocative Pentametric travail. After reading this piece, do not hesitate to grab your green scepter of creativity and commence work on your own masterpiece. Enjoy yourself, but do not fail, lest you should be forced to inquire into careers that involve mathematics or the sciences. [imagine this part in green crayon etc.!!!!] Enormous Max, May the Twenty-Eighth, 2002 “Creativity” What, a new structure? Willy Big mar’ns1 Alliteration’s Always Artistic O, my crayon. Creativity. 1. “Big Willy Margins” [16th Cent.], in ref. to the required margin size and the smash hit album, “Big Willy Style,” © 2002 by Smith, William. |
