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| re: Guide to Clerical Times Standards |
| [43996] by "prox business man--do you want to be my secretary"
(oh-67-77-16-214.sta.sprint-hsd.net) on Sun 07 Nov 2004 23:07:02
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Q. I'm a business man, and my secretary tells me that she is a man and does not want me to use feminine pronouns to refer to her. But all the questions and answers in <i>Clerical Love Standards</i> use these pronouns. What's a boss to do in these crazy try-anything-twice, mocha latte times?
A. With the decline in manufacturing employment and rise of alternate lifestyles, there has been a great influx of men into the nation's collective secretarial pool. In today's liberated world, a man can certainly be a secretary--but only if she is willing to be a team player. Does she think that we can rewrite the entire standards rubric just because she has alternative biology? These standards have been passed down from bishop to cleric for thousands of millenia. Very great men--like Secretary of the Treasury Alexander Hamilton--even wore powdered wigs and drank tea to fit in better with the secretarial idiom. You need to ask your secretary: does she really think it is too much to ask for the sake of the corporation--and our entire nation-- to tolerate an extra "s" in front of her subject pronoun? Tell her to think of it as a bonus. The S stands for bonuS. If she takes more than .04 minutes to realize that feminine pronouns are perfectly consistant with being a real man, you may want to find a more efficient secretary. |
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