| re: I, TOO, HAVE QUESTEONS |
| [4090] by "EXPART ZYZTEM!" (cp192275-a.mtgmry1.md.home.com)
on Thu 12 Jul 2001 18:46:43
[ reply ] [ up ]
|
Dear U.S. Citizen TOBOT,
SAFETY ADVISORY has concocted the following interaction-less expert system for your safety needs:
0. ARE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THE OBJECT
YES: goto 10
NO: goto 1
1. ARE YOU SUSPICIOUS OF THE OBJECT
YES: goto 2
NO gt 10
2. IS THE OBJECT AN OBELISK
YES: goto 3
NO goto 10
3. IS THE OBELISK MONUMENTAL
YES: goto 4
NO: goto 10
4. IS THE MONUMENTAL OBELISK PATTERNED WITH HAMMER AND SICKLE
YES: GOTO 5
NO GOTO 10
5 IS PROPERTY THEFT
YES: GOTO 11
NO, I M GOOD AMERICAN! GOTO 6
6. DO YOU SEEK VIOLENT OVERTHROW???? OF U,S.
I GUESS: GOTO 11
NO WAY USA #1 GOTO 7
7. ARE YOU HOLDING CHALICE OF QUANTUM MECHANIX
YES: HOLD ON TIGHTLY, SPACE COWBOY
NO: GOOD, NOW KILL ALL COWBOY
8: IS FOOT IN CAST
YES: U R MAX! I WILL EAT!!!!!! UR FRIENDS
NO: GOTO #1 AGAIN!
9: IS THE OBELISK A BOMB
YES: CALL AUTHORITEEZ
NO: YOU ARE WRONG IT IS BOMB CALL AUTHORITEEZ OR D13!!
10 IT"S ALL IN UR IMAGINATION SO GO WAY!!!!!1111
11 REPORT UP YRSELF TO JAIL BECAUSE U R OSAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!bin LADEL |
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